The Child Find/Early Intervention screening went off without a hitch I guess. Sloane did her thing and I waited in the waiting room. It took all of an hour and there was great people watching. I love people watching. It is so fun to watch the world go on around you! Today, I did some people watching, but I did more parenting watching.
I am not and would never claim to be an excellent, perfect, fabulous or any other superlative parent. I am doing a good job, I think, but it is a work in progress every minute of everyday. This is my first rodeo!! Some days, I have not a clue what to do with my daughter's behaviors and other days I am nipping them in the butt before they get started. There is one piece of parenting I do know something about because of my educator background....consequences. I was kind of known as a hard ass teacher....priding herself on structure, routine and discipline. Let's just say...kids weren't exactly excited to have me as their teacher at the beginning of the year, but loved it by the end for the most part I think.
After 17 years in the classroom and 10 of those being with special needs children, I learned a bit behaviors. Call it "field training". I try very hard to always give Sloane a do-able consequence. I do not go for the unattainable or big guns because I know there will be no follow-thru and I will lose my credibility as "the boss"..... hahaha
Today, I watched a perfect example of no follow-thru. Sloane's screen was held in the local elementary school with many preschoolers from our city. Next to me, was a couple about my age with their son. He had done 1 part of the screening and was waiting to be called again when he started not skipping, not jogging, not twirling but racing down the school's corridors. His parents called for him many a times from their seats on the bench...never moving. The little lad continued to pretend the halls were his raceway and ignored their calls. I was watching carefully...thinking about how I would have scooped Sloane up by now and exited her into a quiet corner for an eye to eye chat about the no running policy. If you get my drift.......When Sloane is acting fresh, I like to exit the location, take her audience away and chat with her quietly, sternly and hopefully, if I haven't lost my mind....like a parent to child :)
Now, as the roadrunner was making his way thru the halls, neither parent moved until 10 call outs were made. At that point, the dad picked the boy up without a word and plopped him in his mom's arms while he screamed over and over something that sounded like "put me down". Dad never spoke and mom remained calm and asked him over and over to stop being bad.....(as I side note, I am not a fan of "stop being bad") while he kicked her and screamed louder. And then it happened, she said "do you want to leave?" This is all happening while the mom is sitting, not moving with her cell phone in her hand. What, I thought??? This is the Early Intervention state mandated screening...you cant leave...he isn't done yet!! Why on earth would that be the consequence for this behavior and why are you asking him??? No warning, no expectations, just a big gun consequence! Not good I thought. This isn't going to go well....and it didn't. For the next 3-5 minutes, the screaming continued and the mom continued to threaten him with a punishment?? of leaving that wasn't going to happen. Meanwhile, of course, he wants to leave....this wasn't exactly a day at the playground!! Strangers are asking him to do things that may be hard for him or even confusing. What fun is that for a 3 year old??? The big gun consequence was never going to happen.... I felt bad for this little guy! He needed some structure, some consequences and at the very least to know his parents were in charge.
Sloane finished her screening and joined me in the waiting room. I have no idea how she did. Ill assume just fine as I don't see any red flags yet. While we left, the roadrunner came out from his next screening and hit the hallways like he was Carl Lewis in the 1,00 meter dash! Guess, he wasn't leaving the screening early!!
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
Momma Me
It is very sad when you daughter sees a picture of your from 13 years ago and has not a clue that it is you!! Yesterday, I thought to myself.....hmmmmm, did I check the date of expiration on my hubby's passport?? To say that I am getting a bit nervous about forgetting something for our trip is an understatement!! Anyhow, I pulled out the passports and because I am a saver...I had kept my old one! Sloane wanted to play with one so the expired seemed the most logical to give her. Our, up to date 3, were tucked back into the safe.
Sloane opens the passport up that was current from 2000-2010 and asks me who the girl is with the big eyes?!?! I didn't know if I wanted to cry or laugh my ass off. I said "Sloane, that is momma." She replied (out of the mouths of babes)...."Momma, what happened to you? Why you look so different now?" And then proceed to point to pictures in my bedroom that are current and say..."Momma, this is you. This (holding the passport) isn't you." OMG! At this point, I was about to cry.
I am 41. The expired passport had a picture of me at 27. Now, a lot has happened in these 14 years, but I did still think I looked like a version of myself until yesterday. Hahaha!! It reminded me of when I was pregnant and feeling great....I remembered saying to Gina, my teaching partner, something to the effect that I cant believe how I look the same.....and she laughed her ass off at me....clearly reminding me that I was the size of a house!!
When I compared the old passport's picture with the new one from 4 years ago (I was 37), there were some noticeable aging differences, but it was still me. Sloane only recognizes this me! The 'momma me'! The me that looks a bit tired, overly concerned and somewhat scattered. I remember 2 Easters ago sitting at mammie and poppie's table, when my brother said...."Tots, you need to relax about Sloane. This whole cleft thing has aged you. You can see it in your face."
It is true. I have aged. Basic motherhood has an affect on us and Sloane's health concerns or rather, my constant worry about her laryngeal cleft, dulled me out a bit! I didn't think to the point, that Sloane would not be able to ID me in a line-up!! LOL I can feel the concern or heaviness on my face when it creeps up!
Today, Dr. Rahbar's surgical nurse called to do Sloane's pre-op. Talk about being prepared!! May 5th is a long way away. Christine and I chatted for a while after Sloane answered the phone before I could get to it and said "Hello, who is this please?" Christine was roaring with laughter. There wasn't much new info to report. Sloane's file at Children's is quite detailed, so we only had to go over some directions for the day of. As we were talking about the procedure and its post-op, I could feel the waves of "this sucks" coming over me. My face was aging by the minute!! LOL Sloane might have woken up from her nap and not known it was me even though it was the momma me standing in the kitchen!! And as soon as I hung up with Christine, I thought....Turks & Caicos first, Tarra....you are going to take Sloane to see Elmo...Turks & Caicos Take Me Away!!!!! That thought, in itself, lightened up the tension that was now sitting around my eyes about May 5th!
Tomorrow, is Sloane's 3 year old Child Find Screening.....let's all hope she uses only appropriate words during moments of frustration if there are any!!!
Sloane opens the passport up that was current from 2000-2010 and asks me who the girl is with the big eyes?!?! I didn't know if I wanted to cry or laugh my ass off. I said "Sloane, that is momma." She replied (out of the mouths of babes)...."Momma, what happened to you? Why you look so different now?" And then proceed to point to pictures in my bedroom that are current and say..."Momma, this is you. This (holding the passport) isn't you." OMG! At this point, I was about to cry.
I am 41. The expired passport had a picture of me at 27. Now, a lot has happened in these 14 years, but I did still think I looked like a version of myself until yesterday. Hahaha!! It reminded me of when I was pregnant and feeling great....I remembered saying to Gina, my teaching partner, something to the effect that I cant believe how I look the same.....and she laughed her ass off at me....clearly reminding me that I was the size of a house!!
When I compared the old passport's picture with the new one from 4 years ago (I was 37), there were some noticeable aging differences, but it was still me. Sloane only recognizes this me! The 'momma me'! The me that looks a bit tired, overly concerned and somewhat scattered. I remember 2 Easters ago sitting at mammie and poppie's table, when my brother said...."Tots, you need to relax about Sloane. This whole cleft thing has aged you. You can see it in your face."
It is true. I have aged. Basic motherhood has an affect on us and Sloane's health concerns or rather, my constant worry about her laryngeal cleft, dulled me out a bit! I didn't think to the point, that Sloane would not be able to ID me in a line-up!! LOL I can feel the concern or heaviness on my face when it creeps up!
Today, Dr. Rahbar's surgical nurse called to do Sloane's pre-op. Talk about being prepared!! May 5th is a long way away. Christine and I chatted for a while after Sloane answered the phone before I could get to it and said "Hello, who is this please?" Christine was roaring with laughter. There wasn't much new info to report. Sloane's file at Children's is quite detailed, so we only had to go over some directions for the day of. As we were talking about the procedure and its post-op, I could feel the waves of "this sucks" coming over me. My face was aging by the minute!! LOL Sloane might have woken up from her nap and not known it was me even though it was the momma me standing in the kitchen!! And as soon as I hung up with Christine, I thought....Turks & Caicos first, Tarra....you are going to take Sloane to see Elmo...Turks & Caicos Take Me Away!!!!! That thought, in itself, lightened up the tension that was now sitting around my eyes about May 5th!
Tomorrow, is Sloane's 3 year old Child Find Screening.....let's all hope she uses only appropriate words during moments of frustration if there are any!!!
Sunday, March 16, 2014
Momma was Roofied!!
Shortly after I blogged Tuesday night, I think someone mommy "roofied" me!! I have no idea what happened. Sloane was perfectly fine after her vomiting episode! She ate dinner, slept thru the night without a fever or an issue, ate breakfast on Wednesday am and off to school she went. Not a sign of illness to be had....a freaky vomiting episode!?! Very odd!
Sloane was fine, but I think I was roofied!! When I went to bed Tuesday night, my stomach was off. I couldn't decide if I, too, was going to throw up or shit myself. I did not sleep all night much. Lots of tossing and turning! We were up at 4am because my hubby had a trip. I never really went back to sleep between my stomach and my restlessness. When Sloane woke up, I couldn't move. Literally, I couldn't move. My muscles were in shock (I had worked out with a trainer the day before) and I was so fatigued that I wanted to cry! I drove Sloane to school at 9 and was back in bed by 9:30 sleeping until 11:00am.
Never in my life have I ever done this! And I still couldn't move. My hubby called once he arrived at his destination and I tried to pretend that I had my shit together...off to the shower I went to try to feel better! It worked for a bit. I had a coffee date with a friend scheduled that I had no intention of missing. It was top priority so I geared up. I am sure if she was a different person, when I answered the door in my robe newly showered at 11:45, she would've thought I had lost it but this is one of those friends you can be raw in front of with no worries. I told her my roofie saga and after I made myself presentable off we went slowly. We picked up Sloane from school and hit Panera for a snack. I was holding it together but was dreaming of hitting the sheets later for another nap. The minute Sloane was in dreamland, I curled up on the couch and literally passed out until Sloane woke me up 2 hours later. I was now concerned and perplexed about what was happening to me. Lethargic isn't the word for it....I was in a freaking fog!! And my niece was coming over for our sleepover in one hour!!!!
When Stella and her momma arrived, I didn't have to say much. I am pretty sure my appearance cleared up a y questions my sister in law may have had. A bus had run me over and left me in a daze! I didn't move, I didn't eat and I just about engaged with my company for the next 4 hours. I was back in bed by 9:30pm leaving my sister in law alone on our couch watching Walburgers re-runs until God knows what time!!! The girls fell asleep together in Sloane's bed (fabulous) and slept thru the night after Ani joined them when Stella called out for her momma around 3am. I heard none of it and didn't move until 7am. If you have seen the movie Frozen (we have seen it 50 times as Sloane is obsessed), I looked like Ana on Coronation Day!! A drooling, tousled mess!!
I won't bore you with the details again, but Thursday looked pretty much like Wednesday. Sloane and I never left the house after cuzzy and Ani went home and even after my 5pm shower, I looked liked I hadn't slept in days. My saving grace was that nonni took Sloane for some playtime. I could've went to bed the moment Sloane left but the fact was that I had just gotten out of bed 2 hours earlier.....I slept Sloane's nap away and Sloane would be back within an hour. And when Sloane woke up from her nap on Thursday and found me in bed.....she actually said momma, I am tired of being on your bed! It was not a good scene at 1029 (our nickname for our house).
When it was time for me to get Sloane from noni's playground oops...I mean house, the short around the corner walk felt like a mile long jog. I was spent! And I proceeded to sprawl myself across her kitchen table while chatting. Shu (my mil's SO) said....."cup, you don't look like your awake self today." That was certainly a sweet understatement. I wasn't awake at all! I had been mommy roofied and after 36 hours of it....I was getting concerned....who was this person I had become????
Sloane and I headed home with thoughts of only 2 more hours til sleep dancing in my head!! I was on 2 days of no real food although I force fed myself a rice cake with PB in the afternoon which started to repeat itself throughout the afternoon. When I say I was down and out people, I was down and out. My body had shut down. I couldn't bear the thought of putting something in and very little was coming out. Lol!!!
I hit the sheets at 9pm which is like a sin on a Thursday night because I am a "gladiator"....we love the show Scandal in this house. Love, Love, Love!! So the fact that I was going to miss it was almost unbelievable! I took 2 motrin, topped it off with an aleve and closed my eyes with a huge headache begging to feel more like myself in the morning. And it happened. I woke up Friday am feeling more like me. A definite improvement!! Thank the heavens.
As I moved around the house and looked around...I gasped internally. It was not at all as tighty as it normally is! I was embarrassed that my sister in law had seen all that she had. I was so foggy that I hadn't noticed what was happening around me for 2 days! It didn't look like an episode of Hoarders, but it certainly would not have been featured on any segment of HGTV!
I spent Friday getting to know my old self. I was awake and feeling more like me. There was even a trip to the gym! I ate, I drank, I walked and I talked. I was back!! The mommy roofie had worn off. I had lost 2 full days, slept more than I do in a 5 day stretch and had seen the world thru a foggy haze....not fun!!!!
Sloane was fine, but I think I was roofied!! When I went to bed Tuesday night, my stomach was off. I couldn't decide if I, too, was going to throw up or shit myself. I did not sleep all night much. Lots of tossing and turning! We were up at 4am because my hubby had a trip. I never really went back to sleep between my stomach and my restlessness. When Sloane woke up, I couldn't move. Literally, I couldn't move. My muscles were in shock (I had worked out with a trainer the day before) and I was so fatigued that I wanted to cry! I drove Sloane to school at 9 and was back in bed by 9:30 sleeping until 11:00am.
Never in my life have I ever done this! And I still couldn't move. My hubby called once he arrived at his destination and I tried to pretend that I had my shit together...off to the shower I went to try to feel better! It worked for a bit. I had a coffee date with a friend scheduled that I had no intention of missing. It was top priority so I geared up. I am sure if she was a different person, when I answered the door in my robe newly showered at 11:45, she would've thought I had lost it but this is one of those friends you can be raw in front of with no worries. I told her my roofie saga and after I made myself presentable off we went slowly. We picked up Sloane from school and hit Panera for a snack. I was holding it together but was dreaming of hitting the sheets later for another nap. The minute Sloane was in dreamland, I curled up on the couch and literally passed out until Sloane woke me up 2 hours later. I was now concerned and perplexed about what was happening to me. Lethargic isn't the word for it....I was in a freaking fog!! And my niece was coming over for our sleepover in one hour!!!!
When Stella and her momma arrived, I didn't have to say much. I am pretty sure my appearance cleared up a y questions my sister in law may have had. A bus had run me over and left me in a daze! I didn't move, I didn't eat and I just about engaged with my company for the next 4 hours. I was back in bed by 9:30pm leaving my sister in law alone on our couch watching Walburgers re-runs until God knows what time!!! The girls fell asleep together in Sloane's bed (fabulous) and slept thru the night after Ani joined them when Stella called out for her momma around 3am. I heard none of it and didn't move until 7am. If you have seen the movie Frozen (we have seen it 50 times as Sloane is obsessed), I looked like Ana on Coronation Day!! A drooling, tousled mess!!
I won't bore you with the details again, but Thursday looked pretty much like Wednesday. Sloane and I never left the house after cuzzy and Ani went home and even after my 5pm shower, I looked liked I hadn't slept in days. My saving grace was that nonni took Sloane for some playtime. I could've went to bed the moment Sloane left but the fact was that I had just gotten out of bed 2 hours earlier.....I slept Sloane's nap away and Sloane would be back within an hour. And when Sloane woke up from her nap on Thursday and found me in bed.....she actually said momma, I am tired of being on your bed! It was not a good scene at 1029 (our nickname for our house).
When it was time for me to get Sloane from noni's playground oops...I mean house, the short around the corner walk felt like a mile long jog. I was spent! And I proceeded to sprawl myself across her kitchen table while chatting. Shu (my mil's SO) said....."cup, you don't look like your awake self today." That was certainly a sweet understatement. I wasn't awake at all! I had been mommy roofied and after 36 hours of it....I was getting concerned....who was this person I had become????
Sloane and I headed home with thoughts of only 2 more hours til sleep dancing in my head!! I was on 2 days of no real food although I force fed myself a rice cake with PB in the afternoon which started to repeat itself throughout the afternoon. When I say I was down and out people, I was down and out. My body had shut down. I couldn't bear the thought of putting something in and very little was coming out. Lol!!!
I hit the sheets at 9pm which is like a sin on a Thursday night because I am a "gladiator"....we love the show Scandal in this house. Love, Love, Love!! So the fact that I was going to miss it was almost unbelievable! I took 2 motrin, topped it off with an aleve and closed my eyes with a huge headache begging to feel more like myself in the morning. And it happened. I woke up Friday am feeling more like me. A definite improvement!! Thank the heavens.
As I moved around the house and looked around...I gasped internally. It was not at all as tighty as it normally is! I was embarrassed that my sister in law had seen all that she had. I was so foggy that I hadn't noticed what was happening around me for 2 days! It didn't look like an episode of Hoarders, but it certainly would not have been featured on any segment of HGTV!
I spent Friday getting to know my old self. I was awake and feeling more like me. There was even a trip to the gym! I ate, I drank, I walked and I talked. I was back!! The mommy roofie had worn off. I had lost 2 full days, slept more than I do in a 5 day stretch and had seen the world thru a foggy haze....not fun!!!!
Tuesday, March 11, 2014
Book Worthy
Sloane has been saying some very funny things lately. Burst out laughing funny. I should be writing them down in some kind of memory book, but I'm not. Slacker mom! I think this blog serves as a memory book....right?!?
Some days, I can't believe what rolls out of her mouth. Some statements are funny, sweet, thoughtful, or crass! Most of them are memory book worthy!
On Friday, Sloane's teachers told me that she had cut the art teacher's hair while playing hairdresser. When Sloane and I discussed the incident (we play hairdresser ALL the time with fake scissors....not sure why she had real ones...but whatever??) Sloane asked me why Auntie Bec (our hairdresser) is the only one who gets to cut hair. It's not fair, momma!
Yesterday, Sloane looked me dead in the eyes and asked: why are you so happy today??? I burst out laughing. She said it with such teenage attitude and I did have a very sarcastic smile on my face. She read right thru me!
The fact that she told me she couldn't finish her breakfast yesterday because "Momma, I can't. Strawberries and chocolate milk don't go together. Try it. You wont like it. It takes disgusting."
Last night, when she kissed me good night she looked at me with the biggest eyes and in the softest voice asked me if I could just drop her off at ti-ti's tomorrow, telling me she changed her mind, she wasn't going to school. What???? As if she has the choice???
I have laughed a lot in the last few days and I have smiled a smile that is engraved on my heart. My hubby came to bed Sunday night after putting Sloane to sleep. Prayers are part of our routine and Sloane likes to bless people in her life as well as say hello to Grandma Jackie (my mom).
When he came to bed he asked me first if I thought it was normal that Sloane can say the whole Our Father prayer by herself. No, of course I do not think that is the norm at 3 1/2, but the truth be told Sloane does a lot of things that I do not find the norm. Preschoolers are all new to me. 4th grade is my wheel-house. What he told me next melted my heart.....Sloane asked him if Grandma Jackie could stop being an angel and become a person again because that would be fun. My hubby wasn't done with the words before I had a tear in my eye and the smile hit my heart. He told her exactly what I would have...No, Grandma Jackie can't. She is an angel. Once you are angel, you stay an angel.
Now with all those sweet stories, there are also some that make you say.....Shhhhh, Sloane , no, no, no....we don't say that. A perfect example is that my father (poppie) is the biggest buster and my hubby does not trail a minute behind. They enjoy openly teasing each other. With that being said, Sloane says in the car this morning on the way to school. "Poppie is a punk! Daddy said poppie is a punk. Let's call poppie the punk." Hysterical is not a close enough word to describe my reaction. Now, that is one for the books!!!
I have been working on this post all day secretly knowing that Sloane is having a movie date and sleep over tomorrow night. My go-to mommy's 3 kiddos are coming over to watch Frozen with Sloane and my niece, Stella, who is sleeping over. Sloane knows none of this...Not telling her because you never know, something could happen, don't want her to be disappointed. Those are the phrases I used today with everyone I told about our movie date/sleep over night. Well, in the past 2 hours.....Sloane has thrown up all over my mother in laws and my godson has developed white bumps on his throat! Which is why I told Sloane none of the surprise. We can assume Harrison has strep. I can assume nothing about Sloane. She is acting completely normal and has no fever. I will not dare to type what I am thinking. This is to be continued......
Some days, I can't believe what rolls out of her mouth. Some statements are funny, sweet, thoughtful, or crass! Most of them are memory book worthy!
On Friday, Sloane's teachers told me that she had cut the art teacher's hair while playing hairdresser. When Sloane and I discussed the incident (we play hairdresser ALL the time with fake scissors....not sure why she had real ones...but whatever??) Sloane asked me why Auntie Bec (our hairdresser) is the only one who gets to cut hair. It's not fair, momma!
Yesterday, Sloane looked me dead in the eyes and asked: why are you so happy today??? I burst out laughing. She said it with such teenage attitude and I did have a very sarcastic smile on my face. She read right thru me!
The fact that she told me she couldn't finish her breakfast yesterday because "Momma, I can't. Strawberries and chocolate milk don't go together. Try it. You wont like it. It takes disgusting."
Last night, when she kissed me good night she looked at me with the biggest eyes and in the softest voice asked me if I could just drop her off at ti-ti's tomorrow, telling me she changed her mind, she wasn't going to school. What???? As if she has the choice???
I have laughed a lot in the last few days and I have smiled a smile that is engraved on my heart. My hubby came to bed Sunday night after putting Sloane to sleep. Prayers are part of our routine and Sloane likes to bless people in her life as well as say hello to Grandma Jackie (my mom).
When he came to bed he asked me first if I thought it was normal that Sloane can say the whole Our Father prayer by herself. No, of course I do not think that is the norm at 3 1/2, but the truth be told Sloane does a lot of things that I do not find the norm. Preschoolers are all new to me. 4th grade is my wheel-house. What he told me next melted my heart.....Sloane asked him if Grandma Jackie could stop being an angel and become a person again because that would be fun. My hubby wasn't done with the words before I had a tear in my eye and the smile hit my heart. He told her exactly what I would have...No, Grandma Jackie can't. She is an angel. Once you are angel, you stay an angel.
Now with all those sweet stories, there are also some that make you say.....Shhhhh, Sloane , no, no, no....we don't say that. A perfect example is that my father (poppie) is the biggest buster and my hubby does not trail a minute behind. They enjoy openly teasing each other. With that being said, Sloane says in the car this morning on the way to school. "Poppie is a punk! Daddy said poppie is a punk. Let's call poppie the punk." Hysterical is not a close enough word to describe my reaction. Now, that is one for the books!!!
I have been working on this post all day secretly knowing that Sloane is having a movie date and sleep over tomorrow night. My go-to mommy's 3 kiddos are coming over to watch Frozen with Sloane and my niece, Stella, who is sleeping over. Sloane knows none of this...Not telling her because you never know, something could happen, don't want her to be disappointed. Those are the phrases I used today with everyone I told about our movie date/sleep over night. Well, in the past 2 hours.....Sloane has thrown up all over my mother in laws and my godson has developed white bumps on his throat! Which is why I told Sloane none of the surprise. We can assume Harrison has strep. I can assume nothing about Sloane. She is acting completely normal and has no fever. I will not dare to type what I am thinking. This is to be continued......
Thursday, March 6, 2014
Let The Countdown Begin....
First let me come clean.......I cheated! On Tuesday after we got home from our appointment with Dr. Rahbar, I did an extra unnecessary load of laundry and I had a handful of Cheez-its!!! The laundry was a given....I knew I would fall off the wagon sooner than later. But the Cheez-its were a surprise because I have been cleansing for over a month. It only proved what I already knew...even a low key visit to Dr. Rahbar is emotionally draining for me.
I have to say the trip to Children's was very easy. No traffic, no rushing and no whining. Sloane watched Annie on the way up and Sofia the First on the way home. Mammie and I were able to talk (not always a definite on the trips) and occasionally Sloane said something so loud (bc of the earphones) that we were both startled into laughter.
I did learn something not-cleft related on Tuesday. Sloane has figured it out. She knows the deal! When we picked up mammie on our way, poppie hopped in the car to tease Sloane that he was coming not mammie. Sloane, in her ohhhh, poppie, you are silly manner said: "Poppie, you aren't coming today. You only come when we go to where Dr. Rahbar makes me sleep and I stay there. That's not today. Silly poppie" I was surprised and then not at all. Sloane knows. She connected the dots. I guess in a positive way, when her daddy and I are ready to start talking about her upcoming surgery with her, we can be more open and honest.
Dr. Rahbar didn't lay a finger on Sloane. He actually announced to her as soon as he walked into the room that he wasn't going to. It eased the vibe immediately. We reviewed how things are going and then I pulled out our questions. If you are a fellow cleft parent reading this blog, please know that Dr. Rahbar and his staff are ALWAYS interested in answering every question they can.
My hubby had written down 5 essentials.
This last topic wasn't on the list, but the conversation did naturally head into the direction of whether or not to thicken Sloane's liquid a teeny tiny bit until surgery to decrease her aspirations and keep her more healthy than not until May 5th. We haven't talked about this yet. It is on my back burner for the next few days. I think it is a conversation for the weekend after all the dust has settled from our week.
The countdown has begun.....29 days from today we will all be sitting on a beach in Turks and Caicos. So exciting for so many reasons!! and then 59 days from today we will all be past cleft surgery number 2!!
I have to say the trip to Children's was very easy. No traffic, no rushing and no whining. Sloane watched Annie on the way up and Sofia the First on the way home. Mammie and I were able to talk (not always a definite on the trips) and occasionally Sloane said something so loud (bc of the earphones) that we were both startled into laughter.
I did learn something not-cleft related on Tuesday. Sloane has figured it out. She knows the deal! When we picked up mammie on our way, poppie hopped in the car to tease Sloane that he was coming not mammie. Sloane, in her ohhhh, poppie, you are silly manner said: "Poppie, you aren't coming today. You only come when we go to where Dr. Rahbar makes me sleep and I stay there. That's not today. Silly poppie" I was surprised and then not at all. Sloane knows. She connected the dots. I guess in a positive way, when her daddy and I are ready to start talking about her upcoming surgery with her, we can be more open and honest.
Dr. Rahbar didn't lay a finger on Sloane. He actually announced to her as soon as he walked into the room that he wasn't going to. It eased the vibe immediately. We reviewed how things are going and then I pulled out our questions. If you are a fellow cleft parent reading this blog, please know that Dr. Rahbar and his staff are ALWAYS interested in answering every question they can.
My hubby had written down 5 essentials.
- How many children have needed a 2nd surgery? Out of the 200 surgeries Dr. Rahbar has done, only 4 to 5 children need a 2nd surgery. When I asked the question, Dr. Rahbar asked me to remember where we came from. Sloane had a SIGNIFICANT cleft at birth. ALL the children who needed a 2nd surgery were like her. Those children with grades 1 or 2 clefts historically do not need another surgery.
- How many children have needed a 3rd surgery? Only one out of the 200 cases. This child, however, had a much deeper cleft than Sloane's and had a feeding tube as well as a tracheotomy at birth. Her cleft has been closed in a series of 3 operations because it was so deep.
- Does he think this will be Sloane's last surgery? Yes, he does. He is hopeful.
- In regards to making her airway more narrow when he stitches up her cleft more on May 5th,
- will it naturally widen as she grows
- will she a noisier as she breathes
- will it effect her athletic activities as she grows? Sloane's airway will grow as she grows. So any issues we have with her airway after surgery will naturally lessen as she grows and gets bigger and older. She will most likely be a noisier because her airway is more narrow and the air has a smaller canal to travel than the average 3+ child. As for Sloane's marathon career, it is possible. None of the 200 cleft surgical children that Dr. Rahbar has operated on have grown enough to have factual statistics on their endurance into teenage years or adulthood Sloane's lungs have been and are being compromised from her aspirations daily, but the thought process is that the damage hasn't happened for long enough seeing as though she is only 3 1/2. Dr. Rahbar has closed clefts on 18 and 19 year olds, who have suffered from years of pneumonia because their clefts were not diagnosed, but none of the infants, toddlers or children patients have grown old enough to have data on athletic endurance.
- Will the protocol for this 2nd surgery be the same as the first? Yes, it will be. Sloane will spend her first night post-op in ICU and her 2nd night in a regular room recuperating before we head home.
This last topic wasn't on the list, but the conversation did naturally head into the direction of whether or not to thicken Sloane's liquid a teeny tiny bit until surgery to decrease her aspirations and keep her more healthy than not until May 5th. We haven't talked about this yet. It is on my back burner for the next few days. I think it is a conversation for the weekend after all the dust has settled from our week.
The countdown has begun.....29 days from today we will all be sitting on a beach in Turks and Caicos. So exciting for so many reasons!! and then 59 days from today we will all be past cleft surgery number 2!!
Monday, March 3, 2014
No Laundry For You
I have heard of it before. The husband who restricts his wife's use of a credit card or her social activities. I am not a victim of this....yet!! But I have been restricted and this restriction is one that has affected my every day for the past week.
My name is Tarra and I am a laundry addict!! My husband has restricted my use of the washing machine and dryer. It is painful. I love doing laundry and I am happiest when our laundry baskets are empty. Unbeknown to me, my hubby has been tracking my usage of these 2 prize machines by way of our our utility bills. He stated the black and white facts to me last week and grounded me to one load of laundry a day.
Now to some, this may sound like a dream...but to me it is like the clean freak without a vaccuum or the video gamer without a controller. I am having trouble with the withdrawal phase. For the past few days, I have had to talk myself out of sneaking an extra load in. I like to do a white load, colored load and speciality load daily. We have running joke here that my hubby wears the same pair of underwear each day because they are washed and dried before they hit the floor! Lol! Not exactly accurate but I'm pretty sure all occupants in this house only need 3 pair of undergarments based on my old habits.
I have no idea where this addiction came from...or how it grew to be the beast that it is but I am sure it is diagnostic on a few levels.....hahaha
Tomorrow should be easier than the past few days as we won't be here so I won't have to pull myself away from our laundry room. We are heading up to see Dr. Rahbar tomorrow for a check in! Tomorrow marks the 2 month countdown until Sloane's second cleft surgery. I have the snacks packed, the DVDs out (going to Children's is the only time we use the DVD player in the truck....so it's a treat for all of us) and I am getting mentally prepared for the day. My hubby is getting paper and penciled prepared with all his questions for the myth, the man, the legend. More to come on that!
My name is Tarra and I am a laundry addict!! My husband has restricted my use of the washing machine and dryer. It is painful. I love doing laundry and I am happiest when our laundry baskets are empty. Unbeknown to me, my hubby has been tracking my usage of these 2 prize machines by way of our our utility bills. He stated the black and white facts to me last week and grounded me to one load of laundry a day.
Now to some, this may sound like a dream...but to me it is like the clean freak without a vaccuum or the video gamer without a controller. I am having trouble with the withdrawal phase. For the past few days, I have had to talk myself out of sneaking an extra load in. I like to do a white load, colored load and speciality load daily. We have running joke here that my hubby wears the same pair of underwear each day because they are washed and dried before they hit the floor! Lol! Not exactly accurate but I'm pretty sure all occupants in this house only need 3 pair of undergarments based on my old habits.
I have no idea where this addiction came from...or how it grew to be the beast that it is but I am sure it is diagnostic on a few levels.....hahaha
Tomorrow should be easier than the past few days as we won't be here so I won't have to pull myself away from our laundry room. We are heading up to see Dr. Rahbar tomorrow for a check in! Tomorrow marks the 2 month countdown until Sloane's second cleft surgery. I have the snacks packed, the DVDs out (going to Children's is the only time we use the DVD player in the truck....so it's a treat for all of us) and I am getting mentally prepared for the day. My hubby is getting paper and penciled prepared with all his questions for the myth, the man, the legend. More to come on that!
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